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It's amazing what you've done with such a modest budget. I like that boulder.
That is a nice boulder. I guess you don't entertain much, do you?
SHREK: I like my privacy.
DONKEY: You know, I do too. That's another thing we have in common. Like I hate it when you got somebody in your face. You've trying to give them a hint, and they won't leave.
There's that awkward silence. Can I stay with you, please?
SHREK: Uh, what?
DONKEY: Can I stay with you, please?
SHREK: Of course!
DONKEY: Please! I don't wanna go back there! You don't know what it's like to be considered a freak. Well, maybe you do. But that's why we gotta stick together. You gotta let me stay! Please! Please!
SHREK: Okay! Okay! But one night only.
DONKEY: Ah! Thank you!
SHREK: What are you? No! No!
DONKEY: This is gonna be fun! We can stay up late, swappin' manly stories, and in the mornin' I'm makin' waffles.
DONKEY: Where do, uh, I sleep?
DONKEY: Oh, well. I guess that's cool. I mean, I don't know you, and
you don't know me, so I guess outside is best,
you know. Here I go. Good night. I mean, I do like the outdoors. I'm a donkey. I was born outside. I'll just be sitting by myself outside, I guess, you know. By myself, outside. I'm all alone There's no one here beside me.
SHREK: I thought I told you to stay outside.
DONKEY: I'm outside.
BLIND MOUSE #1: Well, gents, it's a far cry from the farm, but what choice do we have?
BLIND MOUSE #2: It's not home, but it'll do just fune.
GORDER: What a lovely bed.
SHREK: Got ya.
GORDER: I found some cheese.
GORDER: Blah! Awful stuff.
BLIND MOUSE #1: Is that you, Gorder?
GORDER: How did you know?
SHREK: Enough! What are you doing in my house? -Hey! Oh, no, no, no. Dead broad off the table.
DWARF: Where are we supposed to put her? The bed's taken.
BIG BAD WOLF: What?
I live in a swamp. I put up signs. I'm a terrifying ogre!
What do I have to do get a little privacy?
BIG BAD WOLF: Aah!
SHREK: Oh, no. No! No!
SHREK: What are you doing in my swamp? Swamp! Swamp! Swamp! All right, get out of here. All of you, move it! Come on! Let's go!
Hapaya! Hapaya! Hey! Quickly. Come on! No, no! No, no. Not there. Not there. Oh!
DONKEY: Hey, don't look at me. I didn't invite them.
PINOCCHIO: Oh, gosh, no one invited us.
PINOCCHIO: We were forced to come here.
SHREK: By who?
THREE LITTLE PIGS: Lord Farquaad. He huffed und he puffed und he signed an eviction notice.
SHREK: All right. Who knows where this Farquaad guy is?
DONKEY: Oh, I do. I know where he is.
SHREK: Does anyone else know where to find him? Anyone at all?
DONKEY: Me! Me!
DONKEY: Oh! Oh, pick me! Oh, I know! I know! Me, me!
SHREK: Okay, fine. Attention,
all fairy tale things.
Do not get comfortable. Your welcome is officially worn out. In fact, I'm gonna see this guy Farquaad right now and get you all off my land and back where you came from! Oh! You! You're comin' with me.
DONKEY: All right, that's what I like to hear, man. Shrek and Donkey, two stalwart friends, off on a whirlwind big-city adventure. I love it! On the road again. Sing it with me, Shrek.
SHREK: Hey. Oh, oh!
DONKEY: I can't wait to get on the road again.
SHREK: What did I say about singing?
DONKEY: Can I whistle?
DONKEY: Can I hum it?
SHREK: All right, hum it.
LORD FARQUAAD: That's enough. He's ready to talk. Run, run, run, as fust as you can. You can't catch me. I'm the gingerbread man!
GINGERBREAD MAN: You are a monster.
LORD FARQUAAD: I'm not the monster here. You are. You and the rest of that fairy tale trash, poisoning my perfect world. Now, tell me! Where are the others?
GINGERBREAD MAN: Eat me!
LORD FARQUAAD: I've tried to be fair to you creatures. Now my patience has reached its end! Tell me or I'll.
GINGERBREAD MAN: No, no, not the buttons. Not my gumdrop buttons.
LORD FARQUAAD: All right then. Who's hiding them?
GINGERBREAD MAN: Okay, I'll tell you.
Do you know the muffin man?
LORD FARQUAAD: The muffin man?
GINGERBREAD MAN: The muffin man.
LORD FARQUAAD: Yes, I know the muffin man, who lives on Drury Lane?
GINGERBREAD MAN: Well, she's married to the muffin man.
LORD FARQUAAD: The muffin man?
GINGERBREAD MAN: The muffin man!
LORD FARQUAAD: She's married to the muffin man.
CAPTAIN OF THE GUARDS: My lord! We found it.
LORD FARQUAAD: Then what are you waiting for? Bring it in.
GINGERBREAD MAN: Oh!
LORD FARQUAAD: Magic mirror.
GINGERBREAD MAN: Don't tell him anything! No!
LORD FARQUAAD: Evening. Mirror, mirror on the wall. Is this not the most perfect kingdom of them all?
MAGIC MIRROR: Well, technically you're not a king.
LORD FARQUAAD: Uh, Thelonius. You were saying?
MAGIC MIRROR: What I mean is, you're not a king yet. But you can become one. All you have to do is marry a princess.
LORD FARQUAAD: Go on.
MAGIC MIRROR: So, just sit back and relax, my lord, because
it's time for you to meet today's eligible bachelorette.
And here they are! Bachelorette number one is a mentally abused shut-in from a kingdom far, far away. She likes sushi and hot tubbing anytime. Her hobbies include cooking and cleaning for her two evil sisters. Please welcome Cinderella. Bachelorette number two is a cape-wearing girl from the land of fancy. Although she lives with seven other men, she's not easy. Just kiss her dead, frozen lips and find out what a live wire she is. Come on. Give it up for Snow White! And last, but certainly not last, bachelorette number three is a fiery redhead from a dragon-guarded castle surrounded by hot boiling lava! But don't let that cool you off. She's a loaded pistol who likes pina colads and getting caught in the rain. Yours for the rescuing, Princess Fiona! So will it be bachelorette number one, bachelorette number two or bachelorette number three?
GUARDS: Two! Two! Three! Three! Two! Two! Three!
LORD FARQUAAD: Three? One? Three?
THELONIUS: hree! Pick number three, my lord!
LORD FARQUAAD: Okay, okay, uh, number three!
MAGIC MIRROR: Lord Farquaad, you've chosen Princess Fiona.
LORD FARQUAAD: Princess Fiona. She's perfect. All I have to do is just find someone who can go.
MAGIC MIRROR: But I probably should mention the little thing that happens at night.
LORD FARQUAAD: I'll do it.
MAGIC MIRROR: Yes, but after sunset.
LORD FARQUAAD: Silence! I will make this Princess Fiona my queen, and DuLoc will finally have the perfect king! Captain, assemble your finest men. We're going to have a tournament.
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Watch songs from original soundtrack and other parts of movie
Welcome to Duloc
I'm on My Way
My Beloved Monster
I'm a Believer
2 I stay with you
3 ogre champion in a quest
4 looking for the princess find a girl dragon
5 Helmet knight and noble steed
6 Blue flower with red thorns
7 Who could love a beast
8 True love first kiss